Abide

I used to be afraid of being alone. I would rather not do it at all than do it alone.

Eating at a restaurant. Going to the movies. Working out. Enjoying the park. 

I think I dreaded the pity in people's eyes.  But really I dreaded my own pity. 

I'm slowly but surely learning the value of being alone. And how good it has been for my soul. 

Currently as I type I'm swinging in City Park allowing the glorious rays of the sun to warm my bear arms following a pathetic run. It's January but somehow New Orleans knows how to get some amazing weather when everybody else is bundling up around the country.  

I've rarely if ever experienced such peace in the still, quiet aloneness (thought I made this word up but turns out it's in the dictionary) of the moment. 

After the absolute worst excuse for a run the week before I do a half marathon that left me quite near a full blown panic attack with labored breathing, I felt an overwhelming need to just hear from God's Word. So I opened my Bible app like all other good smartphone Christians. And thanks to SheReadsTruth's John study, I opened my e-Bible to John 15. 
"Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." (John 15:4-5 ESV)

Abide. I'm all about looking words up for their definition/meaning and even Hebrew/greek translation. Check these out.
 
I couldn't pick just one. All of them give me such a better and beautiful picture of what Jesus was saying in those verses.

Have you ever tarried along? I'm not exactly one to tarry. I actually am that person who speeds walks with a purpose everywhere I go. People who tarry make me anxious. Remember that I'm a planner therefore that comes with to do lists and plans which must be done in a limited amount of time. There is no time to tarry. 

Jesus is saying to me remain/stand/stay/tarry/continue in Me. Sometimes that means for me to stop running around and tarry a little longer with Jesus. More than that, I think for me He is teaching me that what to me may be aloneness (my possible made up word of the day) is Him calling me to abide in Him. 

A week from tomorrow I will participate in a half-marathon which I only committed to do because I wasmt gonna to have to do it alone. Well things happened and guess who's going it alone. Yep, me. But I'm taking this as Jesus calling me to abide. Just remain. Just tarry. Just continue on.