The Search is Over

"Not that I speak from want; for I have learned to be CONTENT in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." Phil. 4:11-13

It has been a year since I started this journey of discovering my identity in Christ as a single woman in a "couples" world, and as I've said before, God has completely turned my world upside down. And praise God for that. Boy, did I need Him to bring me down from my imaginary world back to earth. I'm not saying it has been fun or pleasant, but it has been enlightening and a growing experience. I have found such a deeper relationship with God, and I would not trade that for an earthly marriage any day. This whole journey began with my small group's decision to read Lady in Waiting and subsequently discuss a chapter each week. I could not wait to get this book in my hands. I to this day cannot believe that I didn't start reading it until I was 21, because I think every girl in America should be required to read this gem inspired by no one other than God. No, it's not the Bible, but I fully believe that God uses this book to open the eyes of girls and draw them closer to Himself. Now back to not being able to wait to get this book in my hands ... I clearly had no idea how God was going to tear down every wall in my heart to rubble and begin rebuilding my heart to seek and desire Him before an earthly relationship. That first week I got the book, I couldn't put it down. I read the whole book through in about two weeks (which was in the middle of crazy huge amount of tests, assignments, and misc last semester of undergrad activities). Unfortunately, I read it so fast, and due to conflicts and unforeseen cancellations, our small group wasn't able to make it through the entire book, so I never went back to reread these last few chapters. It was no mistake that I was meant to go back and read this exact chapter at this exact time in my life. How stinkin' awesome is our God? I mean, come on. Sometimes I just don't have the words for how in awe of Him I am.

Lady of Contentment.

The mystery of contentment often seems to escape the understanding of the single woman. She assumes her circumstances justify her condition and give her permission to remain dissatisfied with her life assignment. Not having learned how to lay down the terrible burden of always wanting life to be on her terms, she continues to struggle with the torture of her desires. The restlessness caused by her desire for what she does not have makes waiting seem an impossible task. In fact, to the discontented woman, the word wait probably compares to a "cuss" word in her mind. A Lady in Waiting finds her capacity to wait for God's best to be rooted in contentment.

Sorry for the long quote, but there was just no way to paraphrase all the good stuff in there. The funny thing about all of this is that singles (not only including but especially me) assume the discontentment is found only in the state of singleness; however, this is so far from the truth, that is laughable. Married and single women suffer from discontentment alike. The mutual problem stems from our failure to find our contentment in God alone rather than men and earthly relationships. This chapter focuses in on one part of the story of Ruth and Boaz. If anyone had the right to be discontent, don't you think it would be Ruth? But instead of finding a discontented widow following her mother-in-law, you find a woman who is clinging to God in the worst of circumstances. Of course, we know the story well. Ruth goes to Boaz as her kinsman-redeemer, and he willingly offers to do anything he can for her due the rumors of her noble character. What's funny is that when Ruth goes back home to tell Naomi, Naomi doesn't start partying and planning the wedding. No, Naomi is careful to keep Ruth in check and remind her to stay grounded in her contentment in God.

Waiting ... "Such an assignment is not to cause suffering, but prevent it. Women experience so much needless pain when they run ahead of God's format."

Which leads to the Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt not defraud thyself.

To Be Continued ...